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Post by Aerith on Mar 6, 2007 20:08:48 GMT -5
I'm not good at them - but if you want to post some jokes - be my guest!
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Post by Trucy Wright on Mar 6, 2007 22:14:22 GMT -5
I'll post some later, I have to remember the good ones my uncle told me!
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Post by Aerith on Mar 8, 2007 21:53:22 GMT -5
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Post by Aerith on Mar 8, 2007 21:54:37 GMT -5
Bumper stickers 22
My karma ran over your dogma.
I brake for... wait... AAAH! NO BRAKES!!!!!
A fool and his money are a girl's best friend.
I'm not driving fast-just flying low.
Help starve a feeding bureaucrat.
My other vehicle is a Romulan Warbird!
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
"I is a college student."
If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you. |
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Post by Millertime on Mar 9, 2007 22:52:39 GMT -5
A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. "Human beings are the only animals that stutter", she says.
A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered", she volunteered.
The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.
"Well", she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!
"That must've been scary", said the teacher.
"It sure was", said the little girl. "My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff, Fffff'... and before he could say "F*ck," the rottweiler ate him!"
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Post by Millertime on Mar 9, 2007 22:58:18 GMT -5
And old one, but worth repeating.
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She told me we couldn't afford my $6.00/day for a six pack for beer anymore and I'd have to quit drinking. Then I caught her spending: $65.00 on make-up, $150 for a cut & color, $30 for a manicure, $40 for a pedicure, $50 on vitamins, $300 on clothes and $600 for a gym membership.
I asked how come I had to give up stuff and not her. She said she needed it to look pretty for me.
I told her that was what the beer was for. I don't think she's coming back.
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Post by Aerith on Mar 10, 2007 15:25:02 GMT -5
^ lol  new to me. |
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Post by Millertime on Mar 10, 2007 17:39:01 GMT -5
An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.
"What are you so happy about?" asks the barman.
"Well, I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know I live by the railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place.
Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time!
We made love all night, all over the house. We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top, every position imaginable!"
"Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "You lucky guy.
Was she pretty?"
"Dunno...Never found the head."
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Post by Millertime on Mar 10, 2007 17:40:23 GMT -5
Blonde Joke:
A blonde was sitting on the train reading the newspaper. The headline blared, "12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed."
She shook her head at the sad news, then turned to the stranger sitting next to her and asked, "How many is a Brazilian?"
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Post by Aerith on Mar 11, 2007 16:32:42 GMT -5
King Jeff - tell us a joke!
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Post by Trucy Wright on Mar 11, 2007 16:40:40 GMT -5
Blonde Joke: A blonde was sitting on the train reading the newspaper. The headline blared, "12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed." She shook her head at the sad news, then turned to the stranger sitting next to her and asked, "How many is a Brazilian?" I've heard this one. |
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Post by darkking01 on Mar 11, 2007 18:18:58 GMT -5
how do you punish a blonde?
put her in a circular room and tell her to sit in the corner
how did the blonde kill her fish?
tried to drown it
how did the blonde kill her bird?
threw it off a cliff
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Post by Trucy Wright on Mar 12, 2007 16:29:31 GMT -5
I'm not really fond of blonde jokes, but they're kinda funny.
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new to me.